sweet pancake =)

my mind has been wandering all over the place lately...so many things to think about- past, present, and future. Mmm...not many huge updates since i last wrote...haha, midterms!?!=D --> =='''''''...they'll be done soon...then finals! *sigh* not too sure why...been pretty pessimistic and harshly sarcastic at what i see in my life and the world. Is it anger at myself for being so stoopid...or b/c i'm slowly realizing what this world is like? Is it too much to wish for smthg that could be within grasp, but does not want to be grasped? Do i even know if it doesn't want to be grasped if i don't try to grasp for it? I just feel like wanting to be just deeply immersed in silence w/ Him. Nothing satisfies the desires of my heart and soul except Him...everything else fails and withers away into oblivion. I will store my treasures in Heaven where my Abba asks me to be in His arms. To want to open up to the world w/ spread arms, yet come out the door w/ a masquerade mask of another mask. To want to give more, to be understood, to be held, to be loved, to be cherished, to be spoken to...noone except you Abba?

"From the ends of the earth i call to you, i call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is highter than i. For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe." Psalm 61:2-3
"My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; he is mind forever." Psalm 73:26
"Our holy God lives forever in the highest heavens, and this is what he says: Though i live high above in the holy place, i am here to help those who are humble and depend only on me." Isaiah 57:15 CEV

Abba, my Abba...i'm coming running into your arms...hold me tight and never let me go. I will trust you and come to you with a childlike faith...for You alone know best...omniscent, omnipotent, omnipresent. Give me the strength to keep on moving, the wisdom to make the right decisions and follow thru w/ them, the power to help others see just how great You are, the heart to love others just as You love me unconditionally. There is so much to this world...to believe in the things that cannot be seen...to feel the wind even tho i cannot see it, to know that the Holy Spirit dwells in me and know that You're with me always. You know the struggles and thoughts of mine...i need to immerse myself in the tidal wave of You, to feel Your push and tug as to which way i should swim, to feel the current rush over me and pull me in Your power and love, washing over me like a refreshing cleanse, to be at peace in my soul w/out a ripple to be seen. I don't want to be bogged down by the petty things...help me focus on what needs to be seen. (Ezekiel 47:1-12)

**on a side note...some crzy things that hv happened...prayers answered, more ppl coming to my prayer meeting! I'm learning so much fr/ my co-leader...so glad for the oppurtunity. I slipped on a banana walking to class =='''''...augh, so embarrassing, lol, i thought it was a pile of dead leaves...honest! Spent bout an hour in a store looking at perfume w/ a friend...my olfactory senses O.o Lol, sneezed quite a few times too =P Ate my belated bday ice cream cake at my last cg meeting w/out ne hands and almost got my face smothered in ice-cream >_>. Played cranium and one of my friends was able to telekinetically guess the right answer fr/ his teammate w/out the question even being asked...lol, so hilarious, don't ask how it happened XD.

*I will be faithful to you and make you mine, and you will finally know me as LORD. Hosea 2:20 NLT
*You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. Matthew 22:37-38 NLT
*Humble yourselves before God. Resist the Devil, and he will flee from you. James 4:7 NLT
*The fears of the wicked will all come true; so will the hopes of the godly. Proverbs 10:24 NLT
*The steps of the godly are directed by the LORD. He delights in every detail of their lives. Psalm 37:23 NLT
*The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18 NLT
*The Lord is just! He is my rock! There is nothing but goodness in Him. Psalm 92:15 NLT
*Look! Here I stand at the door and knock. If you hear me calling and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal as friends. Revelation 3:20 NLT
*We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us-they help us learn to endure. Romans 5:3 NLT
*The master said, "Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let's celebrate together!" Matthew 25:23 NLT
*You will keep on guiding me with your counsel, leading me to a glorious destiny. Psalm 73:24 NLT
*Listen to my voice in the morning, LORD. Each morning I bring my requests to you and wait expectantly. Psalm 5:3 NLT
*God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth. John 4:24 NLT
*If we are living in the light of God's presence, just as Christ is, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from every sin. 1 John 1:7 NLT
*A relaxed attitude lengthens life; jealousy rots it away. Proverbs 14:30 NLT
*****cherish the things close to you, but come w/ open arms & heart to the things God has yet to show you*****